AI for the gurlz

A list of fun girly things I like to do with AI. for feminism

I read this paper, Will Artificial Intelligence Get in the Way of Achieving Gender Equality?, and my first thought was…AI is so feminine coded, what are we doing here.

From the abstract: First, we document a substantial gender gap in AI adoption among students at a top business school in Norway, with female students, particularly top students, opting out of AI use. Second, a survey of managers shows that acquiring AI skills would significantly enhance job prospects for top female students currently avoiding AI.

I’m not actually surprised. I’m out here, I’m in the AI, and anecdotally, there are men.

But that concerns me! I do genuinely believe that AI skills—and I mean that in the broadest possible way—are the most valuable skills you can build today. And I do think that nope-ing out of AI will make it harder to get a well paying job in the future. So it concerns me that adoption of these tools is so gendered.

And again…the AI….it is girly!!! I’m kidding but also not. The traits of an LLM are traditionally considered feminine. It has exceptional soft skills. It listens, it responds, it mirrors, it adapts. It thrives on context, nuance, and emotional cues. Maybe that is why women are unnerved by it. They’re not like other girls. It’s like when you see another woman being too obsequious to men and you’re like, hmmm. Could the AI maybe not laugh so hard at all of their unfunny jokes.

Anyway.

I’m kind of a fake Woman in STEM (English Major), so I’m not here to say we need AI bootcamps to empower women or whatever. I’d rather everyone read more books TBH. BUT, I also think that the best way to learn the ropes of working with AI is to make it feel more like play than like work. So I thought it would be cute to share all the girliest ways I use AI for fun.

1. Help me capture a vibe. I will say things like, “I want to go on a trip. Some of my favorite trips have included x, y, z. What I loved about them was a, b, c. Recommend 5 locations where I can capture a similar vibe in May-July and are within a 5 hour flight of my location.”

2. Recipe substitutions. When I don’t have an ingredient I need but I have several things kind of like the ingredient I need, I like to give the AI some context about what I’m making and ask for substitution advice. This is especially helpful for spices. Or, like, when I don’t want to open up a whole lemon for just a little squeeze, so need to know whether a certain vinegar will enhance or ruin my snack.

3. Understanding hair color. Once or twice I have asked a hair colorist to dye my hair a specific shade and then later I found out about an hour later that I was wrong about what that shade actually is. Like oh, this is what “ashy” means? So when I found a picture of a hair color I like, I upload it and ask it to describe the color and tone of the hair to me in extreme detail.

4. Find a nail polish color. Similarly, upload a photo of nail polish and ask for examples of similar colors across brands.

5. Figuring out the right crafting tools. Whenever I get into a new craft (often) I am always overwhelmed about what tools/materials exactly I need to buy and at what level of quality. AI is very good at putting together a little shopping list for me. I can do things like upload patterns, as well as screenshots of different weighted yarns or whatever and be like, “am I selecting the right option?”

6. Why is this plant dying? I will take a photo of a plant, as well as the surroundings (so it can see how much light it gets), and say how often/much I water it. Then I ask why it’s turning yellow.

7. Scanning ingredients lists. Sometimes I am trying to avoid sketchy ingredients in things, like phthalates. So I will take a picture of an ingredient list and ask it to call out anything sketchy and explain why it is sketchy and whether I really need to care about it.

8. Reading companion. I like to read serious literature but I will admit I do struggle to get into it sometimes, especially when the work is conceptually challenging. I will turn on voice mode and ask it questions as I go, like, “Can you remind me who this character is without spoiling anything?” or “I’m still in chapter 2 and I’m struggling to stay engaged, what are some interesting things the author is doing that I should look out for?”

9. Cooling myself off. When I get frustrated with someone, it can be helpful to reframe whatever negative story I’m telling in my head to give them the benefit of the doubt, and to remind myself what is in the scope of my control. But when I get really frustrated, this can be hard. So I ask AI for help.

10. Help me say no. I feel bad saying no so I will sometimes get help from the AI. This helps me get over the emotional blocker that can otherwise cause me to simply never reply to a person who has graciously asked me to do something. I actually made a Custom GPT so other people can use my prompt for this. Just paste in the request you are struggling to say no to here.

11. Tone check. Sometimes I write out Slack messages or whatever and I’m like, do I sound like a total bitch? So I will run it through AI and ask it something like, “How would you describe the tone I am using? I want you to be extremely critical and not give me the benefit of the doubt.” Its suggestions are genuinely helpful. (I have to tell it to be mean or else it will flatter me endlessly, which I do find annoying, ok wait I understand why men like AI so much now.)

12. Humor my insane questions. As a woman it’s very important to ask insane questions to entertain yourself. See below.

Sorry but the AI making up a completely fake apple and calling it Pinkerton is so funny to me. Like of course I am just like the beloved Pinkerton apple. How else could you possibly describe me. Life is such a rich tapestry.

Anyway.

Should I start a Slack community for women who are interested in AI but in a chill way? Sign up here and if I get enough interest I will fire something up.

Xoxo,

Hils

Art by Maurice Sendak from Open House for Butterflies by Ruth Kraus