The Self-Promotion Horror Show

Tactical tips for promoting your work in a way that doesn't feel slimy

Pectoral Sandpiper. Courtesy of the John James Audubon Center at Mill Grove, Montgomery County Audubon Collection, and Zebra Publishing.

Today I want to talk about self-promotion. But first, I need to do some:

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The Self Promotion Horror Show

Running a course requires a level of self promotion that I find uncomfortable. I’ve been reflecting on how the discomfort probably would have stopped me from doing this just a few years ago.

When I was younger, I used to resent the entire idea of self promotion. I would encounter people who seemed primarily focused on it, appearing to do little actual work while happily and vocally taking credit for any good results that happened around them. I took away all the wrong lessons from this, thinking…I don’t know…karma would work it out? And if I just continued to do work that I considered good, eventually I would be rewarded for it.

Well…I had to get burned a few times before I finally figured out that’s not really how it works. And I realized I was going to have to learn how to “do self promotion” in a non-slimy way, because it’s….unfortunately….an incredibly important skill. I’ve come a long way on this (hopefully as you can see up above!!) and I wanted to share some thoughts about how I did that.

What I realized was that there are ways to promote your work that don’t go against your values. In fact, with some reframing, I realized that self-promotion actually lines up with values I care a lot about, like humility, empathy, accountability, and courage.

But maybe you’re still not convinced. So let me start by asking, does any of this sound familiar to you?

1. I didn’t get a promotion I felt I had earned

2. I didn’t get to work on an opportunity that I was excited about

3. My manager left the company right before performance reviews, so I had no one to vouch for me

4. I couldn’t get the resourcing I needed for a project I knew to be important

5. I felt like I had no say regarding my fate in a sea of endless re-orgs

These are all symptoms of a deeper issue: decision-makers at your company do not believe you are having the impact that you believe you are having. It is always possible that they are right, which is a separate problem. But let’s assume you are killing it, but nobody outside of your peers and direct manager sees this.

What is stopping you from talking about your impact?

I’m going to guess it’s one of the below horror shows, or as I like to call them, the Spooky boogeymen of self-promotion.

Our brains are great at coming up with valid-sounding reasons to avoid doing things that make us uncomfortable. That’s all these boogeymen are: head trash. I know this is true because they are easily defeated with some reframing.

Self-promotion isn’t about bragging. It’s about sharing valuable information.

Just because you have witnessed others bragging about their work does not mean that the only way to talk about your work is inherently bragging.

Good self-promotion is simply about making your work more helpful to others by proactively sharing insights, successes, ideas, and highlighting how you and your colleagues’ contributions support team and organizational goals.

By sharing your work and contributions effectively, leaders across the company will see you as someone who drives impact, opening doors to new opportunities and recognition.

See this tweet, which changed my entire perspective:

This is what I mean when I say that it’s all a matter of framing, and with the right framing you will realize that self-promotion actually aligns with values you may care about, like:

1. It takes humility to recognize that people won’t automatically see our work. They’re busy, they’ve got their own stuff going on. Instead of assuming our work will magically break through the noise, we proactively share and connect the dots for how it can help others.

2. It takes empathy to understand what makes other people’s jobs difficult and what’s important to them. Taking the time to frame our work in a way that helps

   inform other people, not in way that is primarily about us, shows that we care.

3. People who value accountability don’t put the blame on others when they don’t

   naturally see our brilliance. We find the balance of doing good work, promoting it in a helpful way, owning our mistakes, and promoting other people.

4. It takes courage to put yourself out there, especially when your brain is working hard to talk you out of it. Anyone with any self awareness feels awkward talking about themselves. But you don’t have to let that fear stop you.

I’ve found that most concerns about self promotion only exist in your head. It turns out that people don’t react negatively to self promotion in a vacuum. They react negatively when there’s an imbalance:

1. Someone only talks about their own work and fails to shout out others

2. Someone only takes credit for wins, but never takes accountability for mistakes

3. Someone only talks about work, but never seems to do any

4. Someone only talks about the impact they’ve had, but doesn’t bother to share helpful lessons or insights

Once you find the right balance, you will find that your self promotion actually helps others as much as (if not more than) it helps you.

So what does this look like in practice?

Here are some tactical steps to getting comfortable talking about your work:

1. Find low-cost ways to be helpful to others. Find ways to be “more visible” that aren’t necessarily just talking about yourself.

   1. Share relevant articles with key takeaways: "I read this and thought of your project. The second section on X seems particularly relevant."

   2. Take notes in meetings and share recaps in public channels afterward, along with your top takeaways, to provide visibility to others.

   3. Give specific feedback or kudos in public channels or to someone's manager

   4. Proactively provide examples of your work if someone is working on a task you've done before that might be new to them

2. Regularly synthesize and share your work:

   1. Publicly share lessons and takeaways : "We tried X strategy, and it improved engagement by 10%. Sharing in case it helps with similar projects."

   2. Write a one-page summary of what you learned after a big project, and share widely.

   3. Post in multiple channels: Don’t assume people will see things that you post once, in one channel. Cross-post all over the place. DM to specific people and say, “thought you might find this helpful!”

3. Tailor your messages to different audiences:

   1. Frame it around their needs. Ask yourself, "How does this help my audience reach their goals?" You can be of value here even if you’re not the one who wrote the post. I always appreciate a message like, “Did you see this data point from Tim's doc? I thought you'd find it useful for the slides you’re working on.” You’re amplifying the work of others, which is always appreciated.

   2. Provide value without creating work for others. Be very clear about whether you need something from them or are just sharing for visibility. I love dropping a “No action needed—sharing this to help with your planning” or "No response necessary--just keeping you in the loop as our plan evolves."

And here are some common mistakes to avoid:

1. Be careful about promoting work that isn’t meeting a quality bar. If you’re not sure, ask your manager not just to give you feedback on a recent deliverable but to grade it. This will help you calibrate your self-awareness and be sure you’re delivering the value you think you are.

2. Watch out for the trap of sharing process over insights. It's easy to update people on all the things you're doing rather than the actual impact being created. Framing your updates around what you are learning avoids this. This is why I love sharing direct customer quotes or takeaways from A/B tests.

3. Pay attention to whether you're creating cognitive load for others. Before sending an update, ask yourself: "What exactly do I want the recipient to do with this information?" If you can't answer that clearly, reframe the update. Your goal is to make information accessible, not to create new tasks or decisions for others.

4. Make sure you're promoting others' work more than your own. Actively look for opportunities to highlight your colleagues' contributions, connect people to helpful resources, and ensure credit flows to everyone involved in wins. When you do this consistently, talking about your own work feels more natural and is received more positively.

How to action this today

Before you close this email, take 2 minutes to:

1. Write down one learning from the past week that you can share with your team

2. Think of an accountability buddy who can help you stay visible in a way that feels authentic. I find it really helpful to have someone I can share drafts with and ask, “helpful or not helpful?”

Remember: Every time you've learned something useful from a colleague's update, it's because they pushed past their own discomfort to share their work. Your knowledge and experiences are just as valuable. Don't let those spooky boogeymen keep you from helping others learn from your journey too.

xoxo,

Hils